When it comes to mental toughness in athletes, I am no certified trainer – just a veteran sports mom who’s seen years of mental battles. And after 20 years of watching my kids play sports, I’ve concluded that they are hearing voices.

These voices either help or hinder their success in those mental battles.

• The first voice whispers lies:
• You don’t deserve to be on the team.
• You can’t do this.
• You’ll never be good enough.
• You don’t know how.
• You should just give up.
• You’ve already tried and failed, what makes you think this time is different?
• You don’t belong here.

The second voice speaks truth:

• You can do this.
• You’ve worked hard and succeeded before, you can do it again.
• You are going to keep trying no matter what.
• You may fall down 7 times, but you can get up 8.
• You are going to be glad for small victories and look for bigger ones to come.
• You are not going to give up.
• You are not a failure. You are simply in the process of improving.
• You do belong! 

Help your athlete – whether he is 5 or 15 – learn to distinguish between the voice of truth and voice of lies, and then to listen to truth.

Janis  B. Meredith, sports mom and coach’s wife, writes a sports parenting blog called JBM Thinks. Check out her Sports Parenting Survival Guide Series with survival guides for football, softball, basketball and volleyball moms.