Any parent to an accomplished young athlete who shows skills and abilities beyond his or her current age level has thought about the idea of “playing up,” allowing the child to compete in an older age group to – potentially – provide better competition and increased opportunities.

But before you fudge that birthday – or ask the league for an exception – there are some things to think about to ensure that playing up is the right choice for your child. Here are three to start with.

1. It’s not just about who is bigger. Sports involve a mental side, too. Just because your child is physically bigger, faster and stronger than many of the children at that age level doesn’t mean that he or she is prepared to compete emotionally and mentally in a sport at a higher level. The developmental difference between a first-grader and a third-grader, for example, can be vast, and you need to ensure that you are setting your child up for a positive experience and a true opportunity to grow. Plus, you have to consider experience with the game and ability to make choices on the field. I am currently the mother to a 7 year old who is legitimately as tall, as heavy and faster than a couple of the children on my seventh-grader’s soccer team. But there is no way that a kid who still cries when he misses a goal and who doesn’t understand that passing is part of the game is ready to integrate into a team at that level –  and probably not even to a team a couple grades ahead. Before you decide to move your child up, it’s important to understand the progression of the sport, a bit about child development and your own child’s emotional and mental maturity level.
2. There are social factors to think about. Athletic participation provides a number of benefits and opportunities for young athletes, one of which is social connections. Many children play sports to make friends or to be with friends that they already have, helping them grow and have better experiences in other areas of life as well. When you play a child up, you potentially eliminate the ability to utilize sports to increase peer relationships while also potentially exposing them to social situations they are not mature enough to manage successfully.
3. Confidence and playing time. After a particularly tough club year, we made the choice to play one of our sons down a team in soccer. The children there were slightly younger and not as skilled, but it provided him a much needed confidence boost and resulted in loads of playing time, which resulted in vast skill development. The following year, he found himself earning a place on a club travel team that he was not prepared to play with before this experience. The potential for the opposite to occur is there when parents play their children up unnecessarily. Sports experts everywhere believe the largest contributor to growth and skill development is playing time, and parents know the difference they see in a child after a strong year in which a child experienced success after success on the field. The important thing is to find a balance between being challenged enough to encourage skill development while also not being relegated to a sideline position without much action or being seen as an asset to the team. Often, parents can help their athletes experience growth at their own age levels by asking their coaches to work them into new positions and giving them opportunities to play leadership roles.

Amanda Rodriguez is a humor and lifestyle blogger at DudeMom.com. In her free time, she enjoys losing weight easily, looking like a soap star the moment she rolls out of bed and riding around town on her unicorn. In addition to having a loose grip on reality, Amanda enjoys traveling to far off lands (or, not so far off lands) with her family and cheering herself hoarse on the sidelines of her sons’ games. The mom behind the blog is a former Teach for America middle school language arts and social studies teacher turned stay-at-home-mom turned graduate student turned professional photographer, freelance writer, pro blogger, Zumba Fitness enthusiast and general director of awesomeness.